중독의 스펙트럼
지나치다는 것은 얼만큼 일까?
음란물을 보는데 있어 항상 마음 속에 드는 생각이 ‘얼마만큼이 너무 많이 보는것일까?’ 하는 질문일 것입니다.
“심각하게 중독된게 아니라면 그런 부정적인 뇌에 영향은 받지 않을 수 있을지도 몰라.” 라고 생각 할지도 모르죠.
지나치다는 것은 얼만큼 일까?
음란물을 보는데 있어 항상 마음 속에 드는 생각이 ‘얼마만큼이 너무 많이 보는것일까?’ 하는 질문일 것입니다.
“심각하게 중독된게 아니라면 그런 부정적인 뇌에 영향은 받지 않을 수 있을지도 몰라.” 라고 생각 할지도 모르죠.
사람들은 직관적으로 음란물 사용에 있어서 2가지로 분류해서 보곤 합니다. 중독되어있거나, 아니면 완전히 괜찮거나. 정해진 선만 넘지 않으면 나는 괜찮다고 합리화 합니다.
중독과 관련하여 뇌에서 발생하는 스펙트럼이 있습니다. 이런 스펙트럼은 당신이 어느 수위의 중독에 있던 지와 상관없이 경험할 수 있습니다.
중독 모습은 광적인 매니아에서, 생명을 위협하는 금단증상, 결과에 대한 노골적인 무시로 설명될 수 있습니다.
그리고 중독의 스펙트럼에는 강박적인 행동들이 있습니다. 어떤 행동을 하고 싶다는 생각이 드는데 그것을 저항하거나 혹은 더 큰 만족감을 위해서 흥분상태를 미루는 자신을 볼 수 있습니다.
이 모든 중독의 범위들을 볼 때, 중독 되었다라는 것을 설명하기 위한 특정한 요소가 필요합니다.
(다음은 음란물 중독뿐 만아니라, 모든 중독을 포함한 현상들입니다.)
반복화
어떤 것의 사용 하는데 있어서 반복적이며 명확한 패턴이 있습니다. 특정한 상황이 발생하면, 중독행동을 실천할 것이라는 것을 스스로가 알게 됩니다. 예를 들어 집에 혼자 있거나, 스트레스를 받았거나, 트리거(위험신호)를 발견했거나, 피곤한 한 주가 끝나고 금요일이 되었거나, 혹은 학교 쉬는시간 일 수도 있습니다.
이러한 패턴을 자신에게서 찾을 수 있나요?
둔감화
예전에 나를 흥분시켰던 것들이 점점 더 익숙해지게 됩니다. 처음에는 비키니를 입을 여성 사진만 보더라도 흥분된다면, 이후에는 알몸이 아니면 더이상 흥분 되지 않습니다. 사진만 보는 것은 더이상 충분하지 않고, 영상을 보아야만 하게 됩니다. 영상을 보고 난이후에는 더 많은 영상들을 찾게 됩니다. 그리고 더 오랜시간 보아야만 하게 됩니다.
이런 경험을 해보신적이 있나요?
의존화
점점 음란물에 의존하게 됩니다. 그래서 기분이 좋지 않을 때, 기분을 좋아지게 하기 위해 음란물을 찾게 됩니다. 스트레스를 다룰 수 있는 단 한 가지 방법이 되거나 혹은 스스로에 대해 기분이 일시적으로 좋아지게 됩니다.
이런 경험을 해보신적 있나요?
통제불가능
음란물이 당신의 일상생활을 방해하기 시작합니다. 내일 시험이 있다는 것을 아는데도 멈출 수가 없지요. 직장에서 음란물을 보다가 들키면 해고될 것을 알면서도 멈추지 못합니다. 여자친구를 만나는 도중에 잠깐 음란물을 보기도 합니다.
이러한 중독의 통제불가능성을 경험하신적이 있나요?
During this event Benjy Uyama will be sharing his thoughts on a topic that he is very passionate about: High Noon’s role in the future of our movement! He will be explaining how High Noon fits into the grand goal to bless 30,000 people in the next 7 years, and even what we can do as individuals. You won’t want to miss this inspiring and informative talk.
There will be small breakouts to discuss this topic and to interact with your fellow volunteers. In the latter half of the event, we will be having a split facilitator and AP time where you can ask questions and receive support.
We would love to see you all there!
It is our commitment to create a safe place where all facilitators and accountability partners are welcome. As this event is all about connection, please come prepared to show your face and to talk.
We want to respect everyone’s schedule so we will be starting promptly at 4:00 pm EST and ending at 5:30 pm EST (10:00 pm – 11:30 pm CET).
HN could not have the impact it has had without the committed and consistent support of our group facilitators and accountability partners. We want to up our support for all of you, and focus on creating a feeling of community amongst all the volunteers.
That is why we have decided to begin a new initiative: a monthly Ascend Volunteer Event! This event will include time to get to know your fellow facilitators and APs, share testimonies, receive education and tips, and have meaningful discussion.
More details will be released soon!
ただいま日本語のビデオコースの作成中です。完了次第ご連絡させていただきます。
祝福を受けて5年以内の女性を対象としたグループです。
連絡先:atsue@kr.highnoon.org / LINE: atskpk
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Richard & Mari Curry have been Blessed in married since December 2005 and have four children. They love working together as a team and are passionate about caring for others, especially in the realm of marriage development. After Mari received her Masters of Divinity from Cheongshim Theological Seminary, she and Richard served as co-pastors in Florida. Since then, they moved to New Jersey and over the years have happily served in a variety of ministry roles from music to education. All the while, working together to serve the Blessed Marriage Project and now High Noon Couples. They were a part of the founding team in 2013 and have been a part of it ever since. They currently serve as the directors of Highnoon Couples. They love the Energize! Retreats because they help realize True Parent’s desire for healthy couples and reminds us of Heavenly Parent’s love and hope for us all!
Contact Mari at: mari@kr.highnoon.org |
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Crescentia & Leighton DeGoede have been Blessed in married since October 2010, and have three children. Crescentia is currently serving as the District Pastor of district 3 and local pastor of the Clifton Family Church. Previously Crescentia was the Director of the National Blessing and Family Ministry of FFWPU for six years. Both Leighton and Crescentia currently serve as Matching Supporters. Prioritizing their marriage, while juggling children, work, and community service has been an exciting challenge. But they continue to find that the more they invest in their marriage, the more they have to give in all areas of their lives. They love giving other couples the opportunity to infuse their marriages with love deposits through marriage enrichment programs. |
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Christoph & Lena Yasutake have been Blessed in marriage since April 2002 and have three teenagers. They are both equally passionate about marriage education and helping blessed couples create happy and healthy families. The Energize! Retreats are one of their favorite ways to share this passion. They served in the Young Couples ministry for six years and are frequent guest speakers at Blessing Workshops. |
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Kate Pugnoli has served as the Community Liaison and is also responsible for generating our monthly newsletter. A former journalist, she has a Masters of Religious Education from the Unification Theological Seminary where she took focused her studies on counseling courses. She has also had experience facilitating small groups. The mother of two sons, now Blessed in marriage, she lives in Tucson, AZ with her husband Simon Herbert. She is committed to working with the Blessed Marriage Project in hopes that marriage enrichment will be available to communities across the country and particularly to bring the Energize! Couples Retreat to as many couples as possible. |
The Blessed Marriage Project (BMP) is an independently funded, grassroots initiative by Blessed couples for Blessed couples. Its programs welcome Blessed couples and married Blessed family members of every age and at every stage of marriage, and from every part of our Unificationist families community.
The mission of BMP is:
The initiative was conceived by two families in 2013, and formally launched the following year, with the donor couple generously giving $100,000 to cover annual expenses. Now their contribution has been over $200,000 annually, to include the related PureMind.Online initiative. (Read more history.)
The BMP is a 501(c)(3) tax exempt non-profit organization (meet the Board of Directors). The programming is led by professional Unificationist marriage educators.
In 2015, the Project began experimenting with new retreat formats, and expanding its menu of educational resources, most notably, PureMind.Online, to help combat the threat that pornography represents to Blessed couples.
Currently, the primary offering of the BMP is its Energize! Couples Retreats, which are designed for Blessed spouses to experience God’s love through a refreshing opportunity to learn useful information and tools, bond and enjoy each other as spouses, and to connect with other Blessed couples. To anchor the benefits in couples’ lives, the Retreat launches an opportunity for a local Small Group experience, and ongoing educational and supportive events and resources.
The purpose of the BMP also includes training young Unificationists to learn to carry out such programming in the future. In addition, the Project provides for training volunteers to facilitate Small Groups and Seminars among past participants and other married couples in their local church communities. The team is looking for other young people with a passion to support couples to join our staff, as well as older members to partners with us and contribute their skills.
The Project is offering Energize! Couples Retreats in 2017 depending upon what hosting communities contribute in terms of funding and local staff, and how their open dates coincide with the availability of BMP staff. We encourage interested communities and potential donors to contact our staff.
Please contact Mitsue Wolfenberger at mwolfenberger@gmail.com.
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